Once, it was a last resort for mothers desperate not to risk adding to their brood, but figures show elective sterilisation is becoming the contraception of choice for a generation of young women certain they don’t ever want children. The NHS refuses the majority of sterilisations to women aged under 30 or women who do not already have children. Elective sterilisation is still such a taboo and people don’t seem able to accept it. Justine James, 28, an academic from Kent, was sterilised privately at a Marie Stopes clinic with ‘no questions asked’ when she was only Seven years later, she is adamant that the decision has never come back to haunt her. I don’t even like children, I have no interest in them and I don’t enjoy being around them, so why would I want any of my own? Annily Campbell, author of Childfree And Sterilised, feels strongly that although women are becoming more confident about admitting they don’t want children, society is less forthcoming. Let’s hope that this so-called sterilisation generation know their own minds as well as they believe they do. And there doesn’t come a time when Charlie McCann rues the day she was sterilised at barely 30 and wishes she could head out, arm in arm with her own daughter, for a day’s shopping.
If You Don’t Have Kids, You Don’t Matter
So where does that leave those of us who are child-free, whom all those people who don’t want to date parents, should be dating? They’ll only date us until they find out that we don’t want kids, and then we’re tossed to the curb too. When I was freshly divorced in the age range of , I wanted kids. And dating was difficult because guys assumed that because of the age range I was in that I wanted to have kids yesterday, so no one wanted to date more than just very casually, because they “weren’t looking to settle down and have kids” at that point.
ChildfreeLove is a dating site for people who have chosen a life without kids and want to connect with like-minded people. Sign up now and get 3 free extra months with any membership! Use code 3EXTRA when checking out.
There were many more of comments than other days with a lot of thoughtful discussion. But I had forgotten it until last week when a reader named Kelly left this comment on the post: I needed this article today. It was difficult to see all my family members with their kids and grandkids – milestones, trips, homes, my life became empty in a matter of minutes. I am forever grateful.
A large part of that is you, TGB readers, who contribute so much useful information so take a bow. Throughout my life I have often said that aside from putting a gun to one’s head, there are hardly any decisions that are irrevocable. But not having children is one of them — for women, after a certain age, there is no going back. Kelly’s comment last week reminded me that childlessness, chosen or through circumstance, can be an issue in old age and that it’s worth repeating this post. Time Goes By has gained many new readers since , and I’m eager to hear from you.
If you recall this post from , maybe you have more to say. Here is the original post with a few minor tweaks but no substantive changes. Many elderbloggers post photos of their grandchildren, tell cute stories about them and about the the joys or, sometimes, heartaches of grandparenthood. I can’t do that.
Guest Post: A Dad’s Choice to Have Children
Caton When I got my first menstrual period one month after my 10th birthday, I knew I did not want children. At that age it was a matter of not being able to imagine going through the physical process of carrying and giving birth to a child. Almost 15 years later and I still feel the same way, except my reasons have changed. I still cringe at the idea of giving birth, but I am in no position to care for a child to ensure that he or she will live a well-balanced life.
I do not want my child to wonder if there is going to be food on the dinner table or how much longer we have at that table until the landlord kicks us out. By no means is this shade to the mothers who are not living the life of the rich and the famous and raising children.
Discussion and links of interest to childfree individuals. “Childfree” refers to those who do not have and do not ever want children (whether biological, adopted, or otherwise).Subscribers: K.
Once again, the same couple friends got into a semantic discussion about the word “childfree” and how, in their eyes, it means something inherently negative. They said they view people who define themselves by the “lack” of something with suspicion, but were quick to point out that this didn’t include their friends “who happen to not have children and don’t plan to. I’ve tried to reach them.
This was going to be my attempt to do it again, but I’ve decided that maybe it’s better left unsent. If I have to explain myself to this degree when someone hurts me, then maybe I don’t need them in my life. Do you have anything in your life that you have to hide from everyone you meet? Do you have to decide whether you trust a person enough to tell them a basic fact about your life? Are you closeted about anything? Then I got to the airport and saw your post.
This is a normal day for me. The response is rarely casual. They bring it to me. But this is a daily occurrence. The same people who would never condemn someone based on their religion, or their sexuality or choice in life partner will immediately launch into a diatribe at me.
They go to movies whenever they want. And they can sleep in. And their numbers are growing.
Aug 01, · The CDC reports that of the 19% of women who remain childless between the ages of 40 and 44, half are childfree by choice. The remaining are unable to .
By Catherine Pearson Getty Images For some women, deciding not to have children is relatively simple, something they’ve known in their bones for as long as they can remember. For others, it’s a decision reached later in life, either after a defining moment that snaps everything into focus or after carefully deliberating for years. And then there are those who wait for a clear answer that never comes. We asked HuffPost Women’s Facebook community about what it’s really like to make the decision to be childfree.
Here are 11 of their stories: Getting pregnant made everything clear. When I was 27, I got pregnant with a guy I was dating. I wasn’t far along, but I could already feel my body changing. My gums were swollen and bled. My breasts were tender.
Is there something on your mind? We’re a positive space for celebrating childfree womanhood without disparaging other women who experience different circumstances, make different choices, or want different things out of life. We’re also an intersectional space, where childfree women from all walks of life are meant to feel welcome and safe. Please look out for yourself. Only give out contact information through private messaging.
Childfree by Choice Dating Site! Dating Photographs Mens Fashion! The desire for companionship and love are childfree by choice dating site basic to our natures questions to ask girl online dating and fundamental to our well being.
Childless By Choice by Dr. Flores Mike, a year-old, attorney has a Match. As far as I can remember the thought of having children made me cringe. Despite this, given societal expectations and the biological tick-tock issue, at one time my husband and I figured we should seriously consider this possibility. We both ended up experiencing severe anxiety.
The mere thought of losing our freedom, restricting our travel plans, and taking on all the obligations involved in parenthood, made our life appear hectic and truthfully quite miserable. And joking about this topic? While most parents understand, and even enjoy, the humor behind how stressful children can be, some parents are too attached to their role as parent to accept any other viewpoint. When I tell people I’m married, most people follow through by asking if we have children.
One more step
Spread the love Every generation has an age where, consciously or otherwise, we expect to be married by. In the old days, it was In more modern times, it was pushed back to These days, the mean age at first marriage is at an all-time high:
The NotMom is dedicated to providing support to women who face challenges dealing with a childless lifestyle, either by choice or chance.
Posted on August 21, by Eleanore Last week I received an interesting email from a reader about some of the dynamics behind being childfree. Half-jokingly because there are lots of kids I do like…just not all of them. I had to fight a desire to run to my car and drive to my peaceful post-divorce, childfree home. I did get married. Everyone spoke about how wonderful they are — sweet, cute, how everything is new to them, how it makes you appreciate life.
What worried me about this scenario was that babies are permanent. Maybe I just needed to try on a baby before buying? Being an auntie seemed like a good compromise. You know, enjoy all the good parts and then reap the financial benefits of being childless. But the more I tried, the less I enjoyed them. With the older kids, the sweetness that sometimes surfaced was quickly drowned out by the mood swings from happy to angry to tears every 10 minutes.